Self-Esteem
Parents owe their children personal worth and self-esteem which are the cornerstones for sound mental health. A child who is constantly criticised, “put down”, reproached, made to feel stupid and inept, continually compared with brothers or cousins who do better, will become so unsure and so terrified that he or she will lose enthusiasm for learning and becoming successful.
Praising the child and expressing love
A child needs to be praised every now and again for his achievements and good behaviour. Some parents find it difficult to voice their approval or praise the child. However, there are other modes of expressing approval as well – a smile, caress or a kiss will convey approval. All these acts of love are very essential for producing children who are healthy in mind and body. It is for this reason that our Shari’ah lays considerable stress on showing love and affection to children. Rasoolullah (Sallallaahu Álayhi Wasallam) said that one who does not have mercy on our children and does not respect our elders, is not from among us.
Equality
Parents should always treat their children equitably. Children tend to grow miserable, lose confidence, become discouraged and resentful if parents show favoritism towards a particular child. It is related by Hadhrat Aa’i'shah (RA) that once she offered a date to a lady beggar who was accompanied by her two daughters. The lady shared the date between her two daughters, depriving herself of a share. Then she departed. When Rasoolullah sallallaahu-alayhi-wasallam came home, she related to him the incident. He said: “Whoever is “involved” with any daughters, and he treats them well (equitably), this will serve as a protection for him from the Fire.”
Basic Islamic Education
It is the duty of every parent to ensure that his children have basic Islamic education which covers aqaa’id or Islamic beliefs, the five principles of Islam, the rules and masaa’il pertaining to these five principles and the correct recital of the Holy Qur’an.
Standards and values
Decent standards and solid values should also be taught to the child. This means being respectful to parents, elders, the muslim scholar, teachers and just laws.
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